How dare I forget to write about my counseling services this morning. No I don't go to counseling...I was helping a friend get over the loss of his lover/submissive playmate or whatever you want to call this woman's relationship to him.
Now the sticky part is: I am friends with both parties involved, although given the situation, there are really no "sides" to take.
She has to get on with some heavy stuff going on in her life - things that I cheer her on to accomplish and resolve.
He is a sweet fella, but one who takes his affairs to the heart, not just the loins. You'd think a "Dominant male" would be cold, calculating...but not at all the case - with him or others like him that I have met. I totally know the pain he is going through from an abrupt breakup. I had a much more cruel one years ago...but I healed and learned from it.
So, I listened, and hopefully helped him realize that he can't hold out hope that he can see her again. That doing so would be even more hurtful for him. One thing is he has a great sense of humor so I think once he purges/vents about what is weighing on his mind, he feels better. I know I am that way, too. I think its a pretty healthy way to be, actually...
One funny thing...in relating how I just don't allow my heart ot be broken..how I have lowered my expectations of "romance" in a relationship to be nearly nonexistent, he replied, "You are a vulcan."
LOL...I am not a trekkie but I did get the pop culture reference and find it somewhat apt.
I have said it before and I will say it again - I know from experience that the only person who will consistently love me the way I need to be loved is ME. I don't shun the affection of others, nor do I withhold giving it to them. Instead of EXPECTING love from others, I take each expression of it as a special gift of that moment.
