Living with two dogs leaves its *ahem* "mark" on your daily living - especially if your home has carpeting. I decided to have my carpets professionally steam cleaned. Now, I am so depressed because it seems that I spent $130 to create a bigger problem than existed before cleaning.

 I own a Bissel extractor which does a pretty good job as far as removing liquids. In the past, if there has been a "doggie don't" situation, or even something as innocuous as a coffee spill, I have blotted, made a mix of oxyclean and hot water, scrubbed the spot and used the extractor. I just felt it was time to do the whole room, as was recommended by countless "expert" opinions and carpet manufactures that I have read.

I contacted Sears home service and tried to get an appointment earlier in the week, but I was stuck with today -the Wednesday before Thanksgiving. Everything I read noted that "truck mounted systems" offer a more thorough cleaning than home units. That they can blast super-hot water into the rug and then utilize a super-extractor to remove most of the dirty water. The carpet will be damp but with fans/air circulation, should dry within a few hours. I figured that would be okay if I went with a morning appointment - that by dinnertime I'd be able to move everything back and begin setting the table for dinner tomorrow.

Last night my family and I moved most of our items from the living room into our basment and our bedrooms. Remember - my house is just over 800 sq. feet - not much room to put things like furniture and such. This morning, I completed the furniture moving with the exception of the larges furniture pieces which had nowhere to go!

As instructed, I vacuumed the carpet. I was pleased to receive a call telling me the technician was going to be right on time for the appointment. The technician walked in my front door, and immediately I was glad my daughter was down in the basement with the dogs. The technician was a transgendered person, apprently still in transition. He/she was about 6'4", huge "man hands" but dyed and possibly permed red hair tucked up into his/her cap, layers of shirts on that still didn't hide the breasts, and an appearance of full face makeup. This person also had a name that was obviously made-up - it seemed like a stage name for a drag queen based on the spelling. The TG/TS issue didn't bother me as much as the attitude I got. This person seemed like he/she was on the defensive or had a very judgemental attitiude. He/she also seemed critical of my housekeeping skills, although I know that is a tactic to try to upsell cleaning products and services. Whatver the reason or motivation, I did NOT appreciate it whatsoever. He/she was giving me the creeps. I kept thinking of "Silence of the Lambs." Nice.

While working seemingly efficiently, I felt uncomfortable asking too much or criticising anything of him/her. I just wanted that person out of my house as soon as possible.

I asked when I could begin moving furniture back into the room - 2 hours? Maybe 4?

"You need to let this dry for at least two days," the technician replied.

I nearly lost it. The technician made a snide remark as he/she left that I didn't really understand.

How the HELL was I going to live in my house when we now had no functional bedrooms (both full of furniture), let alone have Thankgiving with NO DININING ROOM!?!?

I felt the carpet. It was SOAKED. Not "damp." WET.

I ran into the basement, retrieved the Bissel, and began sucking up DIRTY BROWN WATER with my little DIY extractor! What the F***?!?!? My HOME CLEANER is sucking up water that the truck mounted extractor was supposed to get? I must have gotten up over 1.5 gallons of filth into my machine. It was all I could do not to cry.

I hate to be a complainer but I don't have $130 to toss around each day just for fun. I called Sears and spoke to a manager. I explained that I was sucking up dirty water with my crappy little home unit - so why did I blow cash on  something I could have done better myself?

I hesitated about complaining because I was genuinely afraid of the technician. I noted to the manager something to the effect of,"I don't wat to get the technician in trouble OR have him (?) come back to my house."

THANKFULLY the he/she had already gone onto another job in Chicago. So the manager told me that they need to have the "opportunity" to rectify the situation and will send another crew out to just run their extractor over the carpet a few times. Well, considering I already busted my ass sucking up dirty water with my own machine, I didn't much see the point of that but its better than nothing. I would have liked a partial refund but mostly, I want a dry house so I can put everything back where it belongs.

I called my husband at work to vent about my experience with the unusual carpet cleaner.

He asked for clarification: "So, was this person a she-to-he or he-to-she."

"It was a he-to-she," I replied.

"Oh," he remarked, "you got to expereince the Softer Side of Sears?!"