 I am an East Coast expatriate hiding out in the Midwest... I am an urban gal living in the suburbs and occasionally hiding in the country I am a yoga practitioner, fitness enthusiast, believer in the mind-body-spirit connection... I am a mid-life "revert" to the Roman Catholic faith in which I was raised and which has become an enormous source of support, encouragement, inspiration, and joy in my life... I am a mom, sister, daughter, and wife... I am an explorer; adventurous and curious about the world and people around me... I am educated in the formal sense but I gain insight through everyday living... I created this blog at a time of great fear and apprehension in my life. I chose to sustain it because of the discoveries about myself and the world around me that it has revealed. What you can expect to find here: the documentation of a love-hate relationship with the greater Philadelphia area reminiscing about the good-ole-days (the 80's!) complaints about my various ailments and injuries, both real and imagined pictures and stories of gardening, decorating, shopping, sewing my love of irony links to kooky news stories way too much scatological musing for sane people
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Monday, March 28, 2005
I may be absent from the blog/online scene for awhile as I have a really full schedule this week. Playdate for kiddo tomorrow, packing for our trip on Thursday, and (hurrah!) a mammogram on Wednesday.
Oh yeah - can y'all send some good thoughts that that mammogram comes up blank this year - I have too much to do this month to take any time out for a friggin' tumor or two this year!!
:)
Posted at 10:25 am by brandy101
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Friday, March 25, 2005
Dude, that totally shreds....
I just spent 30 minutes picking some teensy bits of former pay stubs, bank statements and mortgage applications out of the gnarly teeth of our apparently sub-par shredder with needle-nose pliers. My back is killing me from bending over that thing and gingerly pulling each snippet out one by one. I finally got it to work again and finished cleaning up that pile of outdated financial papers.
Geeze, I used to work at Arthur Andersen - you'd think I knew a thing or two about proper paper shredding technique...
Posted at 04:14 pm by brandy101
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I am drawing a blank. The only current excitement has been phone conversations with two architects - one of which I'm going to have for an in-home consultation in two weeks, and then coloring Easter eggs today. Big whoop.
Posted at 12:17 pm by brandy101
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Tuesday, March 22, 2005
My Midwife and The Hidden Community
Yesterday my women's healthcare provider called me to assuage some concerns I had about my health, fertility, etc. She is an incredible lady, and ever so patient in listening to my issues, allowing me to express everything on my mind, come up with some of my own soultions. And she isn't even a Doctor. She is a Midwife/Nurse Practitioner. She works along with 2 other midwives and an old-school gynecologist. For certain issues I see the gynecologist because he has to perform procedures that the midwives cannot. He's a pretty cool but quiet and straightforward ob/gyne.
I first came to their practice some 6 yeas ago when I was 7 months pregnant. I was so unhappy with the ob/gyne practice I had been seeing - one which caters to "high-end" clientele, complete with luxuriant waiting room, a list of local celebrity patients, etc. My treatment at that practice kept upsetting me throughout my pregnancy. I strived to have as "natural" a birth as possible and was outright demeaned by the haughty Obstetricians who poo-pooed my wishes and more or less told me I was crazy for not wanting an epidural.
I read in a local newpaper the recent arrival of a practicing Nurse-Midwife at the hospital where I was scheduled to deliver. I called her ofice that day and inquired if she'd accept a low-risk but far-along pregnant patient. She invited me in for a consultation that week. Needless to say, I had my medical records transferred and less than 2 months later she was with my husband and I in the hospital birthing suite for what seemed like hours, helping to deliver our daughter.
Since then I have seen her for routine annual exams, and other issues that have cropped up. I have never felt rushed or "shushed" in any appointments with that practice. Their office is also quite conveniently locted to my home, they are one of the "preferred providers" in my insurance plan, and they have ultrasound and other diagnostic tools right in their office. Their waiting room is clean, but far from posh. I may suggest that they add some magazines - there never seem to be any when I go there!
To me, a competent practitioner taking the time to listen and talk is among the most "premium" qualities a patient could ask for. And yet, when I go there, the waiting room is usually dominated not by the upper-middle-class matrons of my community but of more "forgetten' women. I am usually the only English-speaker in the office. The other women are sometimes surprised - pleasantly - when I chit-chat in (somewhat halting) Spanish. I relish the opportunity to practice and - as one young mother told me - she enjoys the chance to practice English.
The OB/Gyne/Midwifery practice is located a few blocks from a local internationally-known racetrack in our town. Living behind the grandeur of the grandstand, the elegance of the various dining options, are a series of bland dormitories known as "the backstretch." The backstrech dorms were built to house the numerous horse and track workers (grooms, stall cleaners, track maintenance workers, etc.) Originally intended to house only the workers during race season, the workers bring up their familes from Mexcio, Central America, etc and squeeze a family into a studio apartment built for one man , or perhaps two.
Bowing to social and political pressure, racecourses across the country are now beginning to upgrade living quarters to be more suitable to the realistic needs of the families that live there. Our community has begun to recognize these families - especially the children - and provided a variety of health, educational, and social services to them. One example is the mobile dental clinic provided by our local hopsital and local dentists. Our local library makes a bookmobile stop there with books and A/V materials in Spanish.
Considering the geographic location of my OB/Gyne's office to the track, it makes sense that I would see so many backstretch moms-to-be there. But I think it has to be something more than that. I do know that midwifery services are considerably less expensive than a tradiotnal OB/Gyne. I have to wonder, if also, women from rural parts of Central America are culturally more accustomed to midwifery than their American counterparts? Whatever the reasons are, I am glad that these otherwise hidden, sometimes-forgotten members of my community have access to caring and competent healthcare providers to bring their babies into the world.
Posted at 09:55 am by brandy101
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Monday, March 21, 2005
The Race Begins in Earnest
Saturday, we opend a home equity line of credit to get things underway with the home improvement.
Next steps:
- I have to measure each room for dimensions so hubby can auto-CAD our ideas for an addition before we even talk to an architect (this was a recommended step from my contractor-friend.)
- I have asked contractor-neighbor to get me a list of reputable (yet affordable) local residential architects - Mike Brady, where are you?!?!?!? (Alhtough, ick, what a crapulent designer he was: master suite for mom & dad, and ONE bathroom shared by 6 kids?!? Not to mention that hideous staircase.)
- Schedule appt. with architect and get the ball rolling on a design plan that will fit our budget and still give us the space we need, not to metion avoid too many infrastructure upgrades.
- Meet with gyne to talk about a number of issues that I have to have resolved before even trying for a person to help fill up the addition.
And all of this has to happen in the next 10 days - I'm taking kiddo to visit my family in Philly for 5 days over spring break (thank heavens for frequent-flyer rewards!)
I feel like I am literally falling into a pit of debt over this, but I guess "that's life". Busting a move into a new phase is going to take plenty funding, alot of nerves, and very VERY clever planning to execute this plan relatively smoothly.
Posted at 09:31 am by brandy101
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hey - my tagboard is missing more than a week's worht of tags - wassup with that?!?!
Posted at 09:14 am by brandy101
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Friday, March 18, 2005
...like a homemade meatball sub sandwich! (I'll explain later.)
I may not have mentioned it before, but St. Patrick's Day is a big deal around my house, not just because its a pretty huge event in Chicagoland, but because it is, in fact, the anniversary of my first date with hubby.
Back in the day, he and I were friends via some mututal buddies and occasionally hung out at parties, clubs, etc. Then we both wrote and edited articles for a local (now defunct) music magazine. I always liked him because unlike some of the other too-cool-yet-total-slacker guys I knew, he was smart and hard-working (was finishing up his degree in Electrical Engineering at a local and presitigious university.) He was plain-spoken - absolutely no attitude, just honesty. But most of all (what most women love) he was funny, witty, really had a great sense of humor (or at least one compatible with mine.)
I also knew he was shy around women. And I was anything BUT shy around "boys." Extroverted, outgoing, perhaps even bordering on obnoxious (who ME?!)
Long story short, one night mutual friends invited him and me out for dinner at our clique's fave Mexican restaurant. A few margariatas later, we ended up at another bar and the gin-and-tonics (which I bought) loosened his nerve to ask me out on a date for the next evening.
He called at our date time, confirming that he had indeed made plans with me (I started getting a bit irritated) and then showed up at my door sheepishly, dressed incompatibly with the cocktail dress I was wearing (more irritation.) I suggested that I change to a denim skirt and black sweater. Somehow once I got more casually attired, I relaxed a bit more, too.
We went to a restaurant on my street that we both enjoyed because, for 20-somethings, it had kitsch value. It was really an old folks' kind of place, complete with inebrated piano player/crooner, and dinners served with no less than 6 "courses" - a bread basket, relish tray, big kettle of soup, small salad, entree, and mediocre dessert. But we liked it.
We ended up talking much of the evening and into the night. Yadda yadda yadda, 10 years later we have a mortage, 4 pets and a 5 year old kid.
In years past I have cooked up the traditional American celebratory dish of corned beef, cabbage and potatoes. I'd also make a from-scratch Irish Soda Bread. I really do not care for that meal, nor does my daughter. My father-in-law loved it but since he's out of the picture I thought long and hard about what kind of meal to prepare to commemorate not only St. Pat's day but the "10th anniversary."
I found the answer on my trip to Trader Joe's. My family adores the frozen TJ's meatballs. Sounds wierd, but its true - they tase so much like my homemade ones yet are so easy to prepare. Hubby has been begging me to make him a meatball sandwich. I have always argued that daughter and I prefer pasta (low-carb pasta, natch). Well, I decided to get some nice provolone, a gorgeous french roll, and some tangy sauce. I also got a log of fresh, marinated mozzerellla, tons of fresh basil and some half-decent tomatoes.
I put together a wonderful Caprese salad in a pretty serving dish (sliced tomatoes, choped basil, sliced mozzerella, black pepper, salt, extra-virgin olive oil.) I noted that although Italian-american in origin, at least the salad had the colors of the Irish flag: orange-red, green and white! I also made some warm dinner rolls and set out a cruet of olive oil infused with a bit of garlic and parmesan, in which to dip the rolls.
Meanwhile, all day long those meatballs were soaking in the tomato sauce in the crock pot. I hid the entree identity from hubby until, after he finished the salad and rolls, I made the presentation of the much-coveted meatball sub, the roll slightly toasty, the provolone melted on top of the tangy, sauce-drenched meatballs.
He was thrilled. He complimented the entire meal, including the Italian red wine I selected.
I also had some funny cards for hubby and kiddo. They had a good laugh and after dinner we all enjoyed some store-bought green-iced cupcakes.
Hubby is so exhausted each day after work. He's still working 11-hour days and we are still looking for a better opportunity for him. But I am so happy that we were able to slow things down and enjoy a nice meal and some good conversation last night. It reminded me of that first night 10 years ago.
Posted at 11:11 am by brandy101
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Thursday, March 17, 2005
Re-run of My Favorite Groaner
I have used this bad old joke so many times in the past (including on one of my "100 things..." lists) but heck, it's St. Patrick's Day so this Polish-American gal has to share, yet again:
I have auburn hair, fair skin and tons of freckles. Nedless to say, people frequently ask me of my ethnicity, "Oh, do you have any Irish in you?" To which I plainly reply, "Only my husband!"
Happy St. Patrick's Day!
Posted at 12:05 pm by brandy101
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Monday, March 14, 2005
New Additions (rated pg 13)
Although still nauseated about it, we have already applied for an equity line of credit to begin the process of getting architectural plans drawn up and finding out from there how much infrastructure work (and cash) will be required before any actual construction could ever begin. You see, we are on a septic tank and have well water servce - both of which actually work GREAT. OK, well I guess we wouldn't mind the convenience of being hooked up to city sewer service (not have to flush those wierd microbes down the pipe, no calling the "honey truck" to clean the tank every two years, etc.) we would really hate to lose our well. The water is wonderfully pure and delicious. We have it tested for safety's sake and of course, its clean as a whistle - almost like spring water! Of course, my clothes, hair and skin love it becuase its chlorine-free. And our budget loves it because it's water-bill free!
But according to local gov't rules, if we do any construction we have to "modernize" our infrastructure first. Damn!
The worst scenario would be if our municipal body decrees that we must also pave our 75 ft-long gravel driveway (built before municipal code required paving). That would scrap (or greatly delay) any improvement for sure as that would add at least another $12k to the project. Not to mention the possible forced destruction of our existing detached garage (add another $5-6k).
But according to my contractor-neighbor (who gave me this valuable inside-scoop) it is possible that a creative architect could draw up plans that leave enough clearance between existing garage and addition to allow the structure to remain intact AND not create more than 20% additional footprint so as to avoid the forced paving. Ugh. I have a feelng this thing is gonna end up looking like a 3 story closet!
While talking to my neighbor, I also learned of their situation in terms of "additions" and it really put my current situation into perspective. His step-daughter (his wife's 20-something year old daughter, half-sister to their 12 year old daughter) is moving in with them because she just had a baby. Yes, she's single. And unemployed. And, um, I am not even sure if she is a high school graduate. My neighbors each work multiple jobs, insane hours, each week to keep the household going. They are such hardworking people, and yet they were up all night not only getting a room in the finished attic ready for the stepdaughter and baby but ALSO because stepdaughter has two cats, one of whom ALSO gave birth to 4 kittens in their house over the weekend!
"When It Rains, It Pours" is such an apt cliche for their situation. I know from what they have told me that they struggle financially to keep things together.
I thought about how "in control" over certain areas of finances my husband and I are in - I use highly-reliable birth control, we follow a strict household budget, we set aside moneys we "can't touch" into a variety of instituional savings mechanisms...
Hubby, as I have mentioned before, is unhappy at his job, and thus, neither of us want to force the "kid" issue because then it would make him even more beholden to a job (and stresses) that certainly don't add much in the way of "positive vibes" to the family dynamic. He noted (as Abby did in her comments to my previous post) that a baby could stay in our room until construction was completed. But from my research I know that having a home under construction is one of the most stressful, difficult situations - and one in which I think a baby would only further complicate the turmoil. That's not a "lifestyle" I want.
But back to my neighbors and their multitude of babies - human and "other." I noted to my husband "Oh, they have a litter of newborn kittens."
He replied (somewhat in jest), "There aren't enough blow jobs in the world for me to say 'yes' to you bringing another pet in here!"
I rolled my eyes. "I wasn't implying that I wanted another cat!" (we already have 3.)
I continued, "Its just that when kiddo finds out they have kittens she is going to start asking for one."
He walks into kiddo's room, "Hey, kiddo, do you want a kitten?"
Naturally she squealed in delight. I was totally p.o'd on one hand, in that he spoils her like he does(yet would deny ME the joy of a kitten, that bastard! hehehe.) Yet, I am also kind of excited to get a new kitten, too. My neighbor was thrilled when I told her that at least one of her kittens
would be adopted. So we are getting a new "baby" in 6 short weeks.
Posted at 11:42 am by brandy101
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Sunday, March 13, 2005
I am sick to my stomach now after learning how much TIME and MONEY will have to be invested before we can see any semblance of an addition on this lil' (840 sq. ft!) house. Ugh.
Looks like I'll keep that IUD right where it is for now!
:(
Posted at 03:32 pm by brandy101
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