OK, I do not condone gossip but this video (or at least a section of it) reminded me of a situation I experienced a few years ago:

Some time ago, I volunteered to help, along with other room moms, to aid our first grade children with a timeline project they were making. I was assigned to work with the rather steely then-president of the PTA. I had always been intimidated by this rather snooty woman. During our shift, we had two children to assist, one of whom recently moved to the Chicago area from Argentina. I spoke a bit of Spanish to the Argentine girl, and helped her with the project.

After the kids left, PTA-mom remarked on my conversational Spanish.

I have a man who does my lawn who is from Brazil. He told me I should go there to visit, but I told him I dont speak Spanish, noted PTA mom.

I had to stifle my snicker.

They dont speak Spanish in Brazil, I gently replied. They speak Portuguese.

OK, that mistake is a common one. But the revelation of her ignorance got worse.

Portuguese? What? Well ,where else do they speak Portuguese, PTA mom retorted incredulously.

I looked her straight in the eye as I offered my reply: Portugal.

Needless to say, I never let the PTA bully bother me again when I realized what a clueless sh*thead she was.

That revealed, I now offer this rather viral video with the always entertaining (in one way or another), if not aggravating,  Bill OReilly dishing some scathing gossip about another world geography-challenged PTA mom:(listen for the bit about Africa. It is both priceless and terrifying)

My daughter is off from school AGAIN - this time on Nov. 11th for Veterans Day. We are trying to decide what to do. If it were up to me, we would just do something in the neighborhood, like breakfast out and a bit of shopping; maybe a movie. But she is hounding me to go into the city. It is a hassle going downtown with her because she is too little still to walk the 1.5-2 miles from the suburban train station to the tourist sites, such as Water Tower Place or any of the museums, so we end up taking cabs. She L-O-V-E-S taking cabs! I have no idea why she finds them so fascinating.

Her top two choices are the Field Museum (natural history) or American Girl Place. Both have their merits and detractions. The Field Museum is somewhat difficult to access from our train station and we would likely be better off driving and parking at their garage. American Girl Place (now at the urban mall, Water Tower Place) is also far from the train but we can take a cab there without too much trouble, although it would cost a few bucks.

Museum admission and parking is going to run well over $50. Ditto for American girl to have lunch there and take the cab; dont even mention the actual SHOPPING.

Personally, I would like to go to the Art Institute, and have lunch at one of my family*s fave spots - Millers Pub beforehand. But that child of mine finds the Art Institute *boring*. I guess it is too much to expect of an almost-nine year old.

Today, when I am not doing chores or trying to exercise my flabby arse into shape, I will be researching potential field trips for us.

Last night I waited in a line with fellow ticketholders for over 2 hours before we could take our place on the field to witness what ended up being Obamas victory speech.

Much to my surprise, the atmosphere, was rather sober. Everyone was happy, yes, but not jubilant, like a crowd celebrating a world series victory or superbowl. I believe there was an element of doubt in our collective mind that he would actualy WIN and by such a wide margin - despite polls leading to that conclusion prior to election day - that no one had fully grasped the reality of the announcement by CNN on the jumbotron.

I was one of the few who screamed and cheered at all the rally prompts: end of national anthem, during a chorus of Sweet Home Chicago, or introduction to the stage of *the new first family.* On the trek back to the various public transit stations, there was a shocking lack of celebratory ambiance among the throngs of humanity spread throughout the streets of the south loop. People were happy, but most folks seemed determined to just get their arses home after this long process.

I am still glad I was in attendance to witness this incredible chapter in US  - and Chicago - history.

My stomach is in knots over this election. I keep promising myself to turn off the tv, but I keep clicking on MSNBC and CNN incessantly.

I barely slept last night. Now I am jittery from too much coffee, and still have to trek downtown to the big Obama rally in Grant Park (I am one of the lucky ticketholders to the event.)

I was planning on a Starbucks run before the train ride, but now I think might be mroe tempted by a cocktail prior to the trek...

My daughter chose a pirate theme for her costume this year. We were unhappy with the available pattern options out in the marketplace, so she designed her own costume, and I happily complied with her vision (which was fairly easy to sew - I based a pattern for the jumper on one of her tank tops and just extended it to have an a-line skirt.) She even chose the fabric and trim for the tunic and hat at JoAnns; I found the iron-on patch for the front of the tunic,which was a last-minute embellishment. We added a blouse, belt and boots from a thrift store, and one of my old wigs!

She received many compliments as she made the rounds in the neighborhood on halloween.

My adventure today began with helping out with the third grade halloween party, which was beyond raucous, because they decided to host the party for both classes at once - a total of 44 kids.

The station where I was placed was station #5: The Spider Relay Race. Another mom and I stood at opposite ends of two pylons and officiated relay race teams involving *obstacles* or impediments that included racing with eyes closed, wearing a belt with spider legs on it, and/or wearing a plush spider on top of the head. After awhile, it became tiresome, because our station, with only three kids on each team at a time, would move through the race rather quickly, so we would have to invent new iterations for the event until it was time for the kids to move to another station. During one round, a youngster named David (who, consequently never wears a costume because, for whatver reason, he does not celebrate Halloween) was headed toward me, eyes closed, spider perched atop his head. The kids were supposed to tag my hand to know when to turn around. I usally helped them along by tagging them first. David lunged at me and grabbed, not my hand, but my left BOOB. Not only did he grab it, he gave it a little honk! I guess I know why his family doesnt celebrate All Hallows Eve: they already have a devil in the family!

 

Like most Phillies Phans, I was watching the 2nd half of the game last night in anxious anticipation. *Nervous* is not quite the word for it.

Their defensive play last night was absolutely spot-on.

When Brad Lidge (closing pitcher) got the final out with a strike, I jumped up and started SCREAMING. My dogs were so upset, they started barking - either that, or they were joining me in vocal celebration!

If none of you ladies bothered to watch, you missed some fine eye candy on this years Philadelphia Lineup. Not only are these players handsome, they have soap-opera-esque, romatic hero names! Some of my favorites include: Pat Burrell, Chase Utley, Jayson Werth, and Cole Hamels. I could not find still photos that do these gents any justice, but no matter.

The Philadelphia fans ramped up their enthusiasm and energy level last night to make up for that dour evening in the rain, and it was electrifying. Congrats, 2008 World Champions!

Everyone I know who still resides in PA/NJ voiced doubt and concern that the Phils would wrap things up last night - not due to incapability of the team, but something ELSE. Some sort of curse or jinx.

I would call doom-and-gloom downpour of freezing rain a jinx, alright!

Damn.

Last night, while watching the Phillies in the World Series, I was annoyed by the constant negative commentary and criticism of my team by Fox Sports announcer, Joe Buck. He continually poo-pooed the Phils very early on in the game (say, around the 2nd or 3rd inning) because they were leaving men stranded on base. Nonetheless, their pitching and fielding up to that point (and for most of the rest of the game) was right on target.

Sure enough, the Phils came charging back and not only brough men in off base, but also smacked a few single homers *just because they could*. The Phillies DOMINATED the game, winning 10-2. By the end, Buck, aka, Joe The Bummer, appeared incredulous, being forced to acknowledge that after the rhythm of the game got going, (and dont forget - they were up past 2 am the night before in a game!) the Phils demonstrated why they were on the road to World Champion (fingers crossed!!!!)

This is brilliant; imagine the original Bud *Wasssup* guys, but eight years later, mired in the problems of our times.

No matter your convictions, its pretty damn clever and well done.