I was sitting here typing at the dining room table while my daughter happily played with Barbies in the adjacent living room.

She was making the dolls have a conversation among themselves as she dressed and posed them in various outfits.

Made in Indonesia?! Why is that stamped on your butt, asked one Barbie to another.

Because my dad is Chinese, came the plastic dollie reply.

I am one of the many irritated-bordering-on-furious American Catholics dealing with the recent news stories about certain U.S. Bishops deciding to ignore virtually all other DIRE social issues (unemployment, hunger, natural disaster, home loss, etc) and kvetch over Catholics who voted for Obama (or any not-explicity-pro-life candidate.) Furthermore, they are making various threats of *war* against the future administration if their *trump card* issue is not dealt with to their liking.

I do not wish to get into an argument of pro-whatver. My point here, is that their proclamations do nothing but create more division in our own church, and our own communities, which are already suffering financially and emotionally due to the current economic crisis and resulting plagues of unemployment, hunger, domestic violence, crime, etc. In no way does their yammering directly help the suffering of anyone, whether not-yet-born or already here.

The hierarchy has ALWAYS been my sticking point; the area where I find my faith wobbling. And then this pre- and post-election noise from the fellows in fancy dress and funny hats...oh man, it really took me to the edge of my level of trust and commitment.

Today, I went to a local low-price grocery store to stock up on some essential pantry items. I saw a slightly familiar-looking man and his wife each grab a grocery cart and start hefting cases of yams, apple sauce, stuffing mix, green beans, and cranberry jelly into the carts. I could only guess that perhaps they were part of a church food pantry, organizing a dinner for the needy for Thanksgiving.

After I checked out of the store, the couple was carefully loading their stacks of canned goods into their car, parked next to mine.

Are you making a community dinner for Thanksgiving, I asked.

Well, sort of, the man replied. These are for Thanksgiving baskets for needy familes.

Oh, what church are you with, I continued.

As it turned out, the couple was from MY parish! The man runs the food pantry program here in Arlington Heights that benefits our *sister* parish on the South Side of Chicago. Our parish collects food each month, and volunteers bag it up and drive vans down to the parish food pantry, where the food and household items are distributed to all comunity residents in need - not just parish members.

We are putting the baskets together after 7:30 mass on Sunday, the man explained.

Maybe I will come by to help, I offered. See you then!

I am humbled and grateful for the reminder of WHO and WHAT church really is: regular people helping other people.

It is no secret that I am an animal over. I also enjoy Christmas, and, although we really have no room for one in my home, I admire Nativity sets and recall playing with the figurines hidden in the hay of the set we had in display when I was a child.

I received a catalog yesterday from a gift/housewares company. Thumbing through the pages of attractive topiaries and other traditional Chrismas decor, I came across something with more, uh, NOVELTY.  Now,  I love kitsch, but this is just...WRONG:





If you cannot make it out from the photo, it is a nativiy scene of DOGS, including a Golden Retriever puppy as baby Jesus, Virgin Mary in Dalmatian form, St Joseph as some sort of Collie, and the wise men represented by a Boxer, German Shepherd, and Pug. Then we round out the visage with shepherds of a Schnauzer and Labrador Retriever, and a Cocker Spaniel angel.Besides some borderline sacrelidge, that which is *wrong* are as follows:To me, the Greman Shepherd and Collie should be Shepherds, since they are, in fact sheep-herding/guarding breeds. The Black Lab could represent the black king, and of course, I think another king should be a poodle.Maybe what is REALLY wrong is how much I am overthinking the arrangement of this tacky trash!

It seems like EVERY fall, I get sinusitis. This one is not exempt.

I have the typical:

• aching pressure in my face
• clogged nose
• headache
• swollen eyes
• aching upper teeth/gums (yes, this is a real symptom)

Thankfully it is the weekend with little to do except watch some dvds I picked up at the library. And drink tea - LOTS of tea! I will also try some saline spray, which has helped alleviate symptoms in the past.

Strangely enough, I do not have pollen allergies, which is a common trigger of sinusitis. My only environmental allergy is two two types of mold; so I asume the piles of rotting, wet maple leaves outside the hosue might have something to do with that???

My husband is still in Europe: Italy today then tomorrow he departs for a week in Copenhagen, Denmark. He called me about 45 minutes ago and kept recounting his trip today to Como (Lake Como) and how I would just love it and he wished I was there. Maybe someday, if I ever get around to obtaining a passport, I will accompany him on one of his International adventures - hopefully, without a sinus infection!

I just read in the newspaper that my town is planning to increase its tax levy over 3% for 2009 due to dwindling revenues.

Wonderful.

Times like these, I am so glad I live in the smallest, lest expensive - and thus, lowest property taxed - house in the neighborhood!

I have to remind myself of that when I find myself grumbling about our closet space situation...

With all of the horrible economic news that blasts out of my radio and tv, I am already in a pessimistic mood. But yesterday I got an email alert from my local police that we had an armed robbery attempt at a local community bank. That scares the crap out of me, for two reasons.

Burglaries, in general, have been on the rise in our area, but most have been break-ins of parked cars. I fear that as joblessness goes up, so does desperation.

And secondly, there are two banks I visit in the neighborhood; one almost always with my daughter, because she has her savings account there. The first thing upon entrance is a receptionist desk. I doubt the cheery lady behind the circle of formica is packing heat along with the lollipops she gives out!

On another note, I am SO incredibly glad that this year, my family decided to do Pollyana/Secret Santa for adult gift-giving instead of the insane present pile we have done in years past. I got the wish list of the people assigned to me and my husband and with the bonus of free shipping coupon codes, I ordered gifts off the list in about 30 minutes online, and had them shipped to my moms house where I will wrap them in the days before Christmas.

I only now have a handful of gifts to buy: for the hubby, my 2 nephews and my mother-in-law.  I already jumped on a sale & free shiping offer a few weeks ago to get gifts for my daughter on their way to Pennsylvania for the Holidays.

Why on earth would I think that I could buy jeans - JEANS! - online/via catalog? My size has changed, and even with taking measurements, jeans are one of those things that has to be TRIED ON.

Anyway, in case things do move forward in terms of any surgeries, I am sticking with comfy-but-decent-looking knit pants (velour, cotton, fleece, etc) until I either happen upon some miracle jeans that fit and flatter at the right price, or until I lose weight and fit into some oldies I have stored in my attic.

Yesterday I had a procedure at my gyne office that finally allowed my doctor and me to know the source of my various symptoms - a polyp and submucosal fibroid.

The type of fibroid I have is (possibly) removeable via myomectomy with hysteroscope - a procedure my Dr. recommends - HOWEVER, he noted that it is risky if done by a surgeon who does not routinely perform this operation. He referred me to a specialst at Northwestern Memorial Hospital in Chicago; my appointment for consultation is Dec. 2.

After coming home to research this issue, I am now even more uncertain WHY I am going to go with this riskier, with less *guaranteed* outcome procedure, at a very inconvenient location in the city, instead of a full (supracervical) hysterectomy done by a surgeon I know at my excellent hometown hospital. I do understand that the myomectomy is outpatient and supposedly has shorter recovery time. But I really do not like the idea that fibroids can keep recurring even though the one that was bugging you was removed.

From what I read the #1 reason for myomectomy is to preserve fertility. Has no one listened to me, that I have less-than-zero desire to have any more kids? I am going to be forty in a few months, fer chrissakes! I want a guarantee - no more troublesome uterine/ovarian problems, no worry about birth control. No having an operation and then needing another one in a few years. As far as I am concerned, my instinct is: lets just clean the clock and get it over with.

I will wait it out until the Dec 2nd appointment, and I will try to have an open mind as I speak to the Downtown Doctor. But now, by delaying this, I will have to start over with my insurance with my $300 deductible and portion paid for the year.

UPDATE:
Now that I have thought about it for a few days, I am wondering if I should just put off any/all surgeries for some time...my symptoms are troublesome, and sometimes worrisome,  but not life-threatening. Its a way bigger decision than I can deal with right now.My husband has feelings about this topic that complicate my decision-making. In the end, though, I have to live with this body of mine and with whatever decision I make.

Likely the most noticable side-effects of the hormonal treatment I am on (which is essentially birth control pills, but not in a pill format) are some degree of weight gain/bloating and a very  obvious surge of breast growth.

In a mere six weeks I have gone from a 38B to a 40D or DD depending on brand!!!!

My husband LOVES it. I do not.

Why not?

Well, for one thing, I now have to buy all new bras, which is a hassle. I am not only picky about fit and comfort, I am also a cheapskate (no Wacoal in my future). So I will literally squeeze into ill-fitting undergarments until I find the *right* bra or bras that suit my frugal-yet-finicky criteria.

Then, all of my treasured cashmere turtleneck sweaters, while they still fit, look matronly and dumpy now that I am so hefty in the bust. I have noticed that lower-cut (ballet neck, cowl neck, boatneck, v-neck, etc.) necklines are more flattering with the bigger hooters and puffier face. And yet, I dont want to be flashing cleavage all over the suburbs, so I will likely have to invest in some larger-size underwire camisoles, as well.

I dont want to invest TOO much; tomorrow (Monday) I have another procedure to check out my plumbing situation (ie - more invasive gyne testing) because I am still having symptoms similar to those I had when the ovarian tumor(s) was(were) larger. If further workup needs to happen and/or the good Doctor takes me off the hormones, its bye-bye big boobies, hello deflated sandbags.

In a last-minute decision by the powers that be at work, my husband is being sent to Milan (Italy) for a week, leaving this morning. He loves going there because of a particular sandwich, called the *Kenzo*,  served by a local restaurant near his hotel. Similarly, whenever we are visitng the Philadelphia/Jersey shore area, he is certain to indulge in a number of slices of the *Sigi*, his favorite hoagie by oddly-named (but delicious) Planet Hoagie, who conveniently have outposts near the homes in PA and NJ.

After Italy, he spends a week in Copenhagen - where he has never raved about sandwiches but lauds the coffee and little chocolates and pastries served in the morning at the office. Oh, and he also enjoys local brew, Tuborg, while there.

It is strange to me that whenever hubby speaks of his travels around the globe, literally the MAIN topic of conversation is the FOOD. In Brazil, its the steakhouses/bbq places where he eats until nearly bursting. In Hong Kong, its wonderful Thai and Malaysian food.

This is a guy who has likely had the same pants waist size since he was 22 years old; the same guy who rarely eats lunch during the work week (mostly due to lack of time.)

With my sh*tty metabolim, if I indulged in the culinary adventures he has had throughout his travels, instead of business class, I think on the return trip, Id end up in the cargo hold!!!